Main Menu

I want to see the birth certificate

The Obama Conspiracy Theories blog is announcing its editorial position calling for all Republican Candidates for President to release the birth certificates to the public immediately, so that opponents may begin to paw over investigate their veracity.

Barack Obama released his certificate in June of 2008 and it has been the object of intense scrutiny for almost 3 years. It is only right that Republicans come clean with theirs. As a start I demand certificates from these candidates about whom questions have been raised:

  • Mike Huckabee (who has problems telling the United States from Africa)
  • Newt Gingrich1 (who I sincerely doubt was born in Georgia)
  • Andy Martin (who doesn’t even use his real name)


1I also want to see Newt’s baptismal records (both of them) and his marriage records (all three).

21 Responses to I want to see the birth certificate

  1. avatar
    y_p_w March 11, 2011 at 12:12 pm #

    As I’ve written before Newt was supposedly born in Pennsylvania, which doesn’t issue a “long form” any more, and he was adopted. That should make for some interesting backpedaling.

  2. avatar
    sfjeff March 11, 2011 at 12:29 pm #

    Birthers have expressed no curiousity about proof of birth or eligiblity of any other candidates other than Obama’s.

    I am most curious about Sarah Palin- she has always seen vaguely Canadian to me….

  3. avatar
    Scientist March 11, 2011 at 12:34 pm #

    It isn’t just the birth certificate. They should all have to prove they aren’t Moslems.

    sfjeff: she has always seen vaguely Canadian to me

    Vaguely? Her kids played hockey. She was born within an hour’s drive of the border. She can see Canada from her house (even better than Russia). As Governor she did a deal with a Canadian pipeline company. During the campaign she took a prank call from 2 Montreal DJs. I bet she puts maple syrup on her pancakes.

  4. avatar
    Dr. Conspiracy March 11, 2011 at 12:56 pm #

    y_p_w: As I’ve written before Newt was supposedly born in Pennsylvania

    Yes, this supposed Pennsylvanian birth is the primary reason that I have doubts that he was born in Georgia.

  5. avatar
    Dr Kenneth Noisewater (Bob Ross) March 11, 2011 at 1:08 pm #

    Dr. Conspiracy: Yes, this supposed Pennsylvanian birth is the primary reason that I have doubts that he was born in Georgia.

    Screw the birth certificate I want to have the divorce records opened to see if he was properly divorced before marrying his next one.

  6. avatar
    Stanislaw March 11, 2011 at 1:41 pm #

    Dr. Conspiracy: Yes, this supposed Pennsylvanian birth is the primary reason that I have doubts that he was born in Georgia.

    Using birther logic, this is definitive proof that Newt was born in Pennsylvania. Does he have a step-grandmother? If so, someone should probably call her so that she can verify Newt’s Pennsylvanian birth.

  7. avatar
    Reality Check March 11, 2011 at 1:54 pm #

    I want to see Sara Palin’s college transcripts – all six, (or is it seven?) of them.

  8. avatar
    Thrifty March 11, 2011 at 2:03 pm #

    I’m pretty sure that Mike Huckabee was born in Sweden. Unless I see his original long form birth certificate, grad school records, college records, high school records, kindergarten records, BTO original vinyl records, health records, high score on Pac-Man, and a copy of a book report he did on The Red Pony in 5th grade, I’m not gonna buy this “I was born in the United States” nonsense.

  9. avatar
    Stanislaw March 11, 2011 at 2:05 pm #

    Reality Check:
    I want to see Sara Palin’s college transcripts – all six, (or is it seven?) of them.

    I’ve spoken to every college that Sarah Palin allegedly attended, and no one from any of those colleges even remembers her.

  10. avatar
    Daniel March 11, 2011 at 2:11 pm #

    sfjeff: I am most curious about Sarah Palin- she has always seen vaguely Canadian to me….

    Except that she’s stupid, and rude

  11. avatar
    Black Lion March 11, 2011 at 2:13 pm #

    sfjeff: Birthers have expressed no curiousity about proof of birth or eligiblity of any other candidates other than Obama’s. I am most curious about Sarah Palin- she has always seen vaguely Canadian to me….

    Especially when she admitted to going to Canada to take part in their “socialist” free health care….She has never proven that she was not born in Canada…

  12. avatar
    katahdin March 11, 2011 at 3:59 pm #

    My mother got her Pennsylvania birth certificate a few years ago. It had almost no information; just her name and date and county of birth. I guess Pennsyvanians can’t be on the Georgia ballot.

  13. avatar
    y_p_w March 11, 2011 at 4:21 pm #

    katahdin:
    My mother got her Pennsylvania birth certificate a few years ago. It had almost no information; just her name and date and county of birth.I guess Pennsyvanians can’t be on the Georgia ballot.

    Here are a couple of examples. The second one shows even less information than the first; it has no parents named, and neither lists the city of birth (only the county).

    http://www.flickr.com/photos/wohleberc/3854822156/
    http://liberallyspeaking.net/wp-content/uploads/2009/10/Birth-Certificate-copy3.jpg

    Like I said, have fun Newt.

  14. avatar
    US Citizen March 11, 2011 at 5:02 pm #

    Don’t forget their pastors, their parent’s citizenship and the legal statuses of their housecleaners and nannies.
    Oh and if most of these clowns believe they have a right to govern over a woman’s body and abortion rights, I think they should submit to a hair strand analysis for possible substance abuse problems.
    Forget kindergarten records. I want to see what they learned later at DC parties and in backroom deals with lobbyists.

  15. avatar
    Dave March 11, 2011 at 5:36 pm #

    What about Herman Cain? We mustn’t forget Herman Cain.

  16. avatar
    The Magic M March 11, 2011 at 5:38 pm #

    > I’m not gonna buy this “I was born in the United States” nonsense.

    I propose an amended birther bill that includes a requirement for the candidate’s birth certificate to include not just the hospital name, but the name and registry number of the respective universe. Can’t have those parallel-reality-dwellers from Earth-37339 coming over to usurp the precious presidency, now can we?

  17. avatar
    Expelliarmus March 11, 2011 at 5:42 pm #

    Newt Gingrich would have a tough time finding a birth certificate with his last name on it. I think he’s going to have to produce the copies of his adoption records as well. (According to the wikipedia bio, he was named “Newton Leroy McPherson” at birth.

    Also, his mother was only 17 when he was born…. is that old enough to pass on citizenship?

    I can’t find any information about where his birth father, Newton Searles McPherson, was born, Except that it looks like the father’s birth certificate might be tough to find, too, since “Big Newt’s” family had lied to him about his birth certificate — (the lady he thought was his mother was really his grandmother) Maybe the real father was born in Scotland.

    Oh, and Newt spent time living in France when he was a kid.. that’s probably where he got all of his anti-American ideas from. (Remember when he shut down the entire government?)

    See: http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/pages/frontline/newt/vanityfair1.html for more than you ever would want to know about Newt’s life history.

  18. avatar
    FUTTHESHUCKUP March 11, 2011 at 6:51 pm #

    Expelliarmus:
    Newt Gingrich would have a tough time finding a birth certificate with his last name on it. I think he’s going to have to produce the copies of his adoption records as well.(According to the wikipedia bio, he was named “Newton Leroy McPherson” at birth.

    Was his mother born in Ireland?

  19. avatar
    Slartibartfast March 11, 2011 at 10:11 pm #

    sfjeff:
    Birthers have expressed no curiousity about proof of birth or eligiblity of any other candidates other than Obama’s.

    I am most curious about Sarah Palin- she has always seen vaguely Canadian to me….

    Considering that Caribou Barbie lived near the Canadian border and admitted that her family would sneak into Canada to receive heath care, I would think that her doctor-signed, hospital-issued birth certificate would be critical… Especially considering the John McCain is an elderly cancer survivor who was tortured for years in his youth…

    Doc,

    Be sure to ask for Newt’s divorce records – all 3 of them (if he hasn’t had the 3rd divorce yet, he’d better get on that before he runs for president…)

  20. avatar
    US Citizen March 12, 2011 at 7:21 am #

    Expelliarmus: Also, his mother was only 17 when he was born…. is that old enough to pass on citizenship?

    I don’t know. Depending on the location and year of his birth, it’s old enough to say his father was guilty of statutory rape though.

    And really.. 17?? She wasn’t even old enough to vote and was cruel enough to name her kid “Newton Leroy?”
    Sounds like a really dysfunctional “family” he came from.
    (I wonder if his mom was into fig bars or gravity?)

    Newt serves as the perfect argument for sex education in schools or for teenage abortions.
    Had his mom experienced either one, he’d never have been born.
    He’d have been “neutered” for the good of all.
    (sorry ’bout that one.)

    As for Palin, I just can’t see her entering into it all because she can make more money not being president.
    It just doesn’t pay enough and is filled with too many things that would fluster her.
    She quit as governor for money, after all.
    She might because of her unquenchable ego, but it’s hard to ever predict what a wingnut will do.

    But consider Bachmann against Palin in the primaries.
    This would make for the most comedy ever experienced in a political race.
    They could both realize huge warchests if they broadcast their debates exclusively on Pay per View too.

  21. avatar
    Expelliarmus March 12, 2011 at 8:11 am #

    US Citizen: Depending on the location and year of his birth, it’s old enough to say his father was guilty of statutory rape though.

    Well, in all fairness, his parents were married — apparently his mom left high school and married at age 16.