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Taitz for the defense?

I’ve been thinking about the charges leveled at me by Douglas Vogt, and his call for a grand jury to investigate me. If that came to pass, I would need a lawyer. Who might I approach?

Recently I’ve been interested in Loren Collin’s offer to reach across a considerable ideological gap to represent Lucas Smith if he’s being extradited to Kenya as he claims. I though some yin/yang thing might be created if I asked Orly Taitz to represent me in any resulting prosecution for birth certificate forgery.

I’m still weighing the risks and benefits, but the idea is intriguing..

38 Responses to Taitz for the defense?

  1. avatar
    Jim May 16, 2014 at 11:06 pm #

    Hasn’t she accused you of being a part of the conspiracy? Wouldn’t that be a conflict of interest for her? :D

    But, her advice to you would probably be VERY funny and entertaining!!!

  2. avatar
    Lucas Daniel Smith May 16, 2014 at 11:10 pm #

    Doc, I think you should try it out. Orly Taitz would likely be very dedicated to this case, she also likes to be in the spot light (and there is nothing wrong with that) and this would get her back on the stage.

    Something for you to write about, as well.

  3. avatar
    white wolf May 16, 2014 at 11:23 pm #

    what is she accusing you of?

  4. avatar
    Bonsall Obot May 16, 2014 at 11:24 pm #

    It’s a Birfer Möbius strip!

  5. avatar
    John Reilly May 16, 2014 at 11:29 pm #

    This would be a good test of whether Dr. Taitz could actually win a case.

  6. avatar
    Joey May 17, 2014 at 12:00 am #

    I vote YES for Orly Taitz to be Doc C’s attorney in any birther related criminal or civil actions.

  7. avatar
    RanTalbott May 17, 2014 at 12:32 am #

    Let me put it this way: if I were a passport-less, impoverished, quadriplegic Frenchman, falsely accused of travelling to Kansas and strangling an NFL lineman twice my size, I would sell a kidney to pay for a lawyer before I would accept an offer of free representation from Orly.

    With her as counsel, I would fear, not only being convicted, but that the legislature would see some footage from the trial and pass a law authorizing drawing-and-quartering for murder.

  8. avatar
    CarlOrcas May 17, 2014 at 1:02 am #

    RanTalbott:
    Let me put it this way: if I were a passport-less, impoverished, quadriplegic Frenchman, falsely accused of travelling to Kansas and strangling an NFL lineman twice my size, I would sell a kidney to pay for a lawyer before I would accept an offer of free representation from Orly.

    With her as counsel, I would fear, not only being convicted, but that the legislature would see some footage from the trial and pass a law authorizing drawing-and-quartering for murder.

    You make a compelling argument, sir.

  9. avatar
    JPotter May 17, 2014 at 1:20 am #

    I should think The Empty Chair™ should be more than sufficient against any lunacy promulgated by Vogt.

    Hell, any old empty chair would probably do.

    I think the prospect of Orly being on the side of reality would instantly shatter the universe. The universe would be forced to shatter in self-defense. Defense against the impossible.

    Either that, or reality would warp. The second you took her onboard, it would all become true. Doc would have been the forger. All this time, he hoodwinked us so! ;)

  10. avatar
    interestedbystander May 17, 2014 at 3:14 am #

    Doc would be lucky to get the Empty Chair – it hasn’t had a day out of work since wiping the floor with the Birfers in Alabama.

  11. avatar
    Lupin May 17, 2014 at 3:25 am #

    RanTalbott: Let me put it this way: if I were a passport-less, impoverished, quadriplegic Frenchman, falsely accused of travelling to Kansas and strangling an NFL lineman twice my size, I would sell a kidney to pay for a lawyer before I would accept an offer of free representation from Orly.

    On behalf of all Frenchmen, I agree with you.

  12. avatar
    Steve May 17, 2014 at 3:50 am #

    If you don’t care about winning, why not Orly?

  13. avatar
    Keith May 17, 2014 at 4:04 am #

    Steve:
    If you don’t care about winning, why not Orly?

    Because he’d probably end up with 10 years in jail.

  14. avatar
    ArthurWankspittle May 17, 2014 at 5:41 am #

    Irrespective of who you hire as a lawyer, your first witness should be Nancy Ruth Owens.

  15. avatar
    Smirk4Food May 17, 2014 at 8:03 am #

    interestedbystander:
    Doc would be lucky to get the Empty Chair – it hasn’t had a day out of work since wiping the floor with the Birfers in Alabama.

    Ouch!

  16. avatar
    American Mzungu May 17, 2014 at 8:11 am #

    I wouldn’t rush into this thing. You probably should get recommendations from people Orly has represented in the past. It wouldn’t hurt to check with some of the lawyers who post here and at Fogbow. They might have some useful advice for you on what you get when you get Orly. Just sayin’…

  17. avatar
    alg May 17, 2014 at 8:54 am #

    In fairness your should give others an equitable chance to represent you. If the filing of charges should come to pass you ought to send out an RFP to Taitz, Kreep, Apuzzo, Berg, Klayman and SIlbley. And, yeah, I understand that would be a conflict of interest for Silbley, but then I suspect conflict of interest rules hasn’t bothered Silbley in the past.

    :-)

  18. avatar
    Craig HS May 17, 2014 at 10:14 am #

    ArthurWankspittle:
    Irrespective of who you hire as a lawyer, your first witness should be Nancy Ruth Owens.

    And maybe follow that up with Lucas Smith?

    You’d have to do some fancy lawyerin’ to waive any possible extradition actions to get him to appear though…

  19. avatar
    Yoda May 17, 2014 at 11:30 am #

    I think you should hire all of them. It would be a dream team.

  20. avatar
    Andrew Vrba, PmG May 17, 2014 at 1:08 pm #

    Hey Doc, what do you make of this?

    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/06/04/orly-taitz-birther-movement_n_1568481.html

    “Orly Taitz, who famously demanded that President Barack Obama provide documentation of his United States citizenship, has blown past disclosure requirements for her political campaign.”

  21. avatar
    Dr. Conspiracy May 17, 2014 at 1:31 pm #

    ? 2012 story.

    Andrew Vrba, PmG:
    Hey Doc, what do you make of this?

    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/06/04/orly-taitz-birther-movement_n_1568481.html

    “Orly Taitz, who famously demanded that President Barack Obama provide documentation of his United States citizenship, has blown past disclosure requirements for her political campaign.”

  22. avatar
    Andrew Vrba, PmG May 17, 2014 at 1:34 pm #

    Oops, my bad.

  23. avatar
    bob May 17, 2014 at 2:52 pm #

    William (at Birther Report) unironically asks:

    So Doc. is considering the “need” for an attorney, why?

    If I was accused of a crime I didn’t commit, I wouldn’t think for the moment of hiring an attorney. My position would be prove it and bring it on. Something I could do myself knowing I didn’t have anything to do with a crime. But he can’t? Hmmmmmmm…

    Moran.

  24. avatar
    Fred Flintstone May 17, 2014 at 3:03 pm #

    You would be better off by hiring Pastor James David Manning. At least in his “imaginary” court trial of President Obama 9still haven’t figured out why it was a crime to serve in the CIA, since its owned by us). He’s 1-0-0 in court cases in the fictions world and Orly has, to my knowledge, even won a case, won an election . . . oops, wait. I forget she won the “I married a man for his money” sweepstakes.

  25. avatar
    J.D. Sue May 17, 2014 at 11:48 pm #

    bob: If I was accused of a crime I didn’t commit, I wouldn’t think for the moment of hiring an attorney.

    —-
    I assure you, attorneys everywhere cringe at such foolish words. You’ll be trying to hire an attorney soon enough, who will have to deal with the ignorant stuff you did and said while you weren’t thinking “for the moment of hiring an attorney.”

    BTW, Doc, although an attorney who represents himself has a fool for a client, anyone would be a bigger fool to hire Orly.

  26. avatar
    Dr. Conspiracy May 17, 2014 at 11:51 pm #

    In a hypothetical world crazy enough to charge me with forging Obama’s birth certificate, perhaps Orly is the sane choice.

    J.D. Sue: BTW, Doc, although an attorney who represents himself has a fool for a client, anyone would be a bigger fool to hire Orly.

  27. avatar
    J.D. Sue May 18, 2014 at 12:02 am #

    Dr. Conspiracy: In a hypothetical world crazy enough to charge me with forging Obama’s birth certificate, perhaps Orly is the sane choice.

    J.D. Sue: BTW, Doc, although an attorney who represents himself has a fool for a client, anyone would be a bigger fool to hire Orly.

    —-

    “Orly is the sane choice” makes no sense, even in such a crazy hypothetical world.

  28. avatar
    roxy7655 May 18, 2014 at 1:06 am #

    Orly Taitz: a Disturbed Woman for Disturbing Times

  29. avatar
    Suranis May 18, 2014 at 6:01 am #

    I’m sure if he is ever brought in for questioning he will refuse the provided free lawyer then.

    bob:
    William (at Birther Report) unironically asks:

    So Doc. is considering the “need” for an attorney, why?


    If I was accused of a crime I didn’t commit, I wouldn’t think for the moment of hiring an attorney. My position would be prove it and bring it on. Something I could do myself knowing I didn’t have anything to do with a crime. But he can’t? Hmmmmmmm…

    Moran.

  30. avatar
    ArthurWankspittle May 18, 2014 at 5:08 pm #

    bob:
    William (at Birther Report) unironically asks:
    If I was accused of a crime I didn’t commit, I wouldn’t think for the moment of hiring an attorney. My position would be prove it and bring it on. Something I could do myself knowing I didn’t have anything to do with a crime. But he can’t? Hmmmmmmm…

    William shows himself to be the sort of person who doesn’t understand the details of the law, nor the best way to proceed in such circumstances. He strikes me as the sort of person who, if arrested, would say something that either incriminates himself or opens up the possibility of additional charges.
    Anyway, no one has said what the lawyer is being hired for. Bringing a case for defamation is a possibility in some jurisdictions.

  31. avatar
    bgansel9 May 18, 2014 at 6:26 pm #

    I understand the goodwill angle, but Doc… SHE HAS NEVER WON A CASE so why would you do that to yourself? You clearly know by now that she does not really understand the legal process and operates more like Monkeys throwing feces at the wall to see where it lands. Do you really want to do that to yourself?

    No, I don’t think you do.

  32. avatar
    Bonsall Obot May 18, 2014 at 6:49 pm #

    bgansel9:

    SHE HAS NEVER WON A CASE so why would you do that to yourself?

    She’s due?

    Any day now?

  33. avatar
    Dr. Conspiracy May 18, 2014 at 8:11 pm #

    I appreciate the warnings against using Taitz as my attorney, but they they miss the fundamental logical underpinning of the idea. The statement is: if I am charged with forgery then I should hire Taitz as my lawyer. If it is impossible that I would be charged, then the proposition is trivially true.

  34. avatar
    Jim May 18, 2014 at 8:20 pm #

    Dr. Conspiracy:
    I appreciate the warnings against using Taitz as my attorney, but they they miss the fundamental logical underpinning of the idea. The statement is: if I am charged with forgery then I should hire Taitz as my lawyer. If it is impossible that I would be charged, then the proposition is trivially true.

    But, if you lost, you’d have a ready appeal. Incompetent council. :lol:

  35. avatar
    Thomas Brown May 18, 2014 at 8:59 pm #

    I see Doc’s line of thought: why get involved with Taitz when Empty Chairs can be found all over the place?

  36. avatar
    Dr. Conspiracy May 18, 2014 at 9:47 pm #

    Empty chair was having breakfast with us this morning, but then somebody sat on him.

    Thomas Brown: I see Doc’s line of thought: why get involved with Taitz when Empty Chairs can be found all over the place?

  37. avatar
    Andrew Vrba, PmG May 18, 2014 at 11:38 pm #

    Dr. Conspiracy:
    Empty chair was having breakfast with us this morning, but then somebody sat on him.

    Empty Chair, now there’s a party animal! Man, let me tell you, Empty Chair can drink an Irishman under the table, and is like a ninja, when it comes to party crashing! What a card, that one!

  38. avatar
    JPotter May 19, 2014 at 3:31 pm #

    Dr. Conspiracy:
    In a hypothetical world crazy enough to charge me with forging Obama’s birth certificate, perhaps Orly is the sane choice.

    Beginning to sound like Doc in Wonderland!