Main Menu

El Presidente Romney?

imageChallenges to Mitt Romney’s presidential eligibility are growing. There is a lawsuit in California and now there is even a Facebook group dedicated to the issue: Mitthers.

As you know, Mitt Romney is not his real name: it’s Ricardo or Willard or something like that. Romney’s father Jorge Romney (Americanized to “George”) was born in Mexico to polygamous Mormons who had fled the United States to obtain religious freedom in liberal Mexico. Mitt Romney follows a family tradition of running for US President under a cloud. His father dropped out of the race before the issue of his foreign birth gathered momentum.

In response to the growing demands for documentation, Romney has released his short-form birth certificate:

Etch A Sketch parody of a romney birth certificate

Print Friendly

, ,

56 Responses to El Presidente Romney?

  1. avatar
    misha March 23, 2012 at 3:56 pm #

    I like that picture of Joseph Farah Willard Mitt Romney.

  2. avatar
    ASK Esq March 23, 2012 at 4:04 pm #

    Now for the burning question:

    How did they make the o’s so good on the Etch-a-sketch?

  3. avatar
    Scientist March 23, 2012 at 4:15 pm #

    Nice diversion to cover up the truth Doc, with the story about Mitt’s father. The real question is: was Mitt himself born in Canada? The “official story” is of course that he was born in Detroit. But a simple glance of a map shows that right across the river is Windsor, Ontario, the hot-spot of southwestern Ontario. Not only that, Windsor is SOUTH of Detroit. How can Canada, the Great White North, be SOUTH of the US? This all smells VERY fishy. How do we know that Mitt’s parents didn’t go across the river for a night of sin and debauchery drinking Canadian whisky and smoking Rothman’s cigarettes? Or maybe, like Sarah Palin, they wanted to take advantage of great socialized medicine (even though Canada didn’t have socialized medicine unntil the 1960s). Either way, it’s certainly possible Monsieur le Premier Ministre Romney came into the world in Canada and was smuggled back across the river and falsely registered in Michigan by his well-connected father who would later be Governor. It certainly is more plausible than the stories about Obama being born in Kenya.

    After all, the Romney family still owns a house in Ontario, which was where Mitt was going with the dog tied to the roof of the car. Now why would a real American own a house in a foreign country, not to mention bank accounts? Can you imagine what the birthers would make of Obama owning a house in Kenya? So let’s stop beating around the bush, Doc. Romney may be Mexican by jus sanguinis, but let’s not ignore the possibility that he is Canadian by jus soli.

    I have a call in to Stephen Harper to ask him to open the RCMP files on this very important question. I will let you know as soon as I hear.

  4. avatar
    misha March 23, 2012 at 4:32 pm #

    Scientist: The “official story” is of course that he was born in Detroit. But a simple glance of a map shows that right across the river is Windsor, Ontario

    Perky ‘Canada’ Has Own Government, Laws:
    http://www.theonion.com/articles/perky-canada-has-own-government-laws,19927/

  5. avatar
    y_p_w March 23, 2012 at 4:47 pm #

    Scientist: Nice diversion to cover up the truth Doc, with the story about Mitt’s father. The real question is: was Mitt himself born in Canada?

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Point_Roberts,_Washington

    Strange things when you look at a map. It’s just south of the 49th parallel, and is US territory by treaty. However, you’ve got to go into Canada to get back to the rest of the US by land.

  6. avatar
    Scientist March 23, 2012 at 4:57 pm #

    y_p_w: Strange things when you look at a map. It’s just south of the 49th parallel, and is US territory by treaty. However, you’ve got to go into Canada to get back to the rest of the US by land.

    Same with Lake of the Woods, Minnesota. Why isn’t Sheriff Joe looking into this?

  7. avatar
    sactosintolerant March 23, 2012 at 5:06 pm #

    The National Archives has no records of who swam from Canada to Detriot during the century of his birth. I have potential probable doubts.

  8. avatar
    Bob March 23, 2012 at 5:59 pm #

    Was the mother Mexican-born too? What else is Romney hiding?

  9. avatar
    sactosintolerant March 23, 2012 at 6:41 pm #

    Do ALL his moms need to be US citizens?

  10. avatar
    y_p_w March 23, 2012 at 7:01 pm #

    sactosintolerant: Do ALL his moms need to be US citizens?

    I don’t think that was an issue with him. However, I’m wondering about how many “grandmothers” he had.

  11. avatar
    Dr. Conspiracy March 23, 2012 at 7:02 pm #

    I will neither confirm, nor deny, that this article was paid for by Restore Our Future.

    Scientist: Nice diversion to cover up the truth Doc, with the story about Mitt’s father. The real question is: was Mitt himself born in Canada?

  12. avatar
    justlw March 23, 2012 at 7:04 pm #

    Not “Mittheads” ?

  13. avatar
    justlw March 23, 2012 at 7:07 pm #

    “Algerian. Why did it have to be Algerian?”

  14. avatar
    Dr. Conspiracy March 23, 2012 at 7:12 pm #

    ROFL. Did you have to ask?

    justlw: “Algerian. Why did it have to be Algerian?”

  15. avatar
    misha March 23, 2012 at 7:58 pm #

    “Challenges to Mitt Romney’s presidential eligibility are growing. There is a lawsuit in California and now there is even a Facebook group dedicated to the issue”

    The GOP created a monster, and now they cannot contol it.

  16. avatar
    J. Potter March 23, 2012 at 8:40 pm #

    justlw:
    “Algerian. Why did it have to be Algerian?”

    I was hoping someone would throw a shout-out for our favorite typeface! :D

    Doc is doing a great job of serving up the popcorn while the birthers are in a lull. They really spoiled us over in January and February.

  17. avatar
    J. Potter March 23, 2012 at 8:54 pm #

    “Mitthers.”

    It’s a great start to a solid parody, and I hope it goes far!

    It is pronounced, “Mythers” \mithurz\, right? Better be. Gets extra mileage.

    “Mitters” \mitturz\ would just suck.

  18. avatar
    Joe Acerbic March 23, 2012 at 9:02 pm #

    Willardo Romneygez?

  19. avatar
    Thrifty March 23, 2012 at 9:33 pm #

    Challenges to Romney’s eligibility? At least they’re being consistent, if wrongheaded.

  20. avatar
    misha March 23, 2012 at 10:06 pm #

    ASK Esq: Now for the burning question:

    How did they make the o’s so good on the Etch-a-sketch?

    Forgery.

  21. avatar
    Paper March 23, 2012 at 10:18 pm #

    You are on a roll!

  22. avatar
    J. Potter March 23, 2012 at 11:07 pm #

    I keep thinking that’s a Wal-Mart behind Señor Mittens.

  23. avatar
    ASK Esq March 24, 2012 at 1:01 am #

    misha: Forgery.

    I took the etch-a-sketch apart, and found that my table was covered in layers of…something, I’m not sure what.

  24. avatar
    veritas March 24, 2012 at 1:13 am #

    so if this issue about obama has been settled why the hell are you still here??? what next are you going to debate people who believe the moon is made of cheese????

  25. avatar
    Obsolete777 March 24, 2012 at 1:21 am #

    veritas: what next are you going to debate people who believe the moon is made of cheese????

    Is that your next goofy conspiracy that you believe? I’d almost have more respect for you.

  26. avatar
    misha March 24, 2012 at 1:24 am #

    “Lugar de nacimiento”

    The place of birth is blank…hmmmm.

  27. avatar
    misha March 24, 2012 at 1:26 am #

    veritas: what next are you going to debate

    We’re going to debate Glenn Beck’s refusal to deny he raped and murdered a girl in 1990, and why Rush Limbaugh has not denied he was an accessory after the fact.

  28. avatar
    misha March 24, 2012 at 1:37 am #

    veritas: what next are you going to debate

    The ethics of tying a dog to the roof of a car, for 12 hours. Also, are Glenn Beck and Sarah Palin going to stage “The Aristocrats in Alaska”?

  29. avatar
    Dr. Conspiracy March 24, 2012 at 2:01 am #

    It’s pretty clear from my forensic analysis that the text in that section has been inverted and shaken.

    misha: The place of birth is blank…hmmmm.

  30. avatar
    misha March 24, 2012 at 2:12 am #

    Dr. Conspiracy: that section has been inverted and shaken.

    “Shaken, not stirred”

  31. avatar
    misha March 24, 2012 at 2:15 am #

    veritas: what next are you going to debate

    How big of a shonde Eric Cantor is.

  32. avatar
    Dr. Conspiracy March 24, 2012 at 2:23 am #

    The issue about Obama is settled, but the issue with the birthers is not. After Obama leaves office, I’ll either pick up whatever new conspiracy theory is in vogue or take off my shoes, climb a tree and learn to play the flute.

    veritas: so if this issue about obama has been settled why the hell are you still here??? what next are you going to debate people who believe the moon is made of cheese????

  33. avatar
    Dr. Conspiracy March 24, 2012 at 2:33 am #

    That describes it pretty well.

    J. Potter: Doc is doing a great job of serving up the popcorn while the birthers are in a lull. They really spoiled us over in January and February.

  34. avatar
    jayhg March 24, 2012 at 3:10 am #

    veritas:
    so if this issue about obama has been settled why the hell are you still here??? what next are you going to debate people who believe the moon is made of cheese????

    Our next topic of debate is entitled “Bithers and the Any…Day…Now Phenominon”

  35. avatar
    Majority Will March 24, 2012 at 4:53 am #

    Dr. Conspiracy:
    The issue about Obama is settled, but the issue with the birthers is not. After Obama leaves office, I’ll either pick up whatever new conspiracy theory is in vogue or take off my shoes, climb a tree and learn to play the flute.

    “Rah, rah rah! That’s the spirits we have here – ok? – So come
    on kids…”

    :-D

  36. avatar
    J. Potter March 24, 2012 at 10:00 am #

    ASK Esq: I took the etch-a-sketch apart, and found that my table was covered in layers of…something, I’m not sure what.

    According to Breaking Bad, it’s thermite. Surely not pure thermite … if I recall the episode it required some processing.

  37. avatar
    J. Potter March 24, 2012 at 10:02 am #

    Dr. Conspiracy: The issue about Obama is settled, but the issue with the birthers is not.

    That’s what I was gonna say! Birthers are very unsettled. This is like birdwatching, or trainspotting. Where the birds / trains are insane.

  38. avatar
    J. Potter March 24, 2012 at 10:03 am #

    Dr. Conspiracy:
    That describes it pretty well.

    Never fear, you know they’ll get stir up something, or step in something :D

    The action in MS just got promising … the Dems there have gone on the offensive!

    http://www.thefogbow.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=88&t=7097&start=462

  39. avatar
    Northland10 March 24, 2012 at 10:07 am #

    Maybe a debate on the possible benefit of taking a short position on popcorn futures.

    veritas:
    so if this issue about obama has been settled why the hell are you still here??? what next are you going to debate people who believe the moon is made of cheese????

  40. avatar
    Jim March 24, 2012 at 11:09 am #

    J. Potter: Never fear, you know they’ll get stir up something, or step in something

    The action in MS just got promising … the Dems there have gone on the offensive!

    http://www.thefogbow.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=88&t=7097&start=462

    Oh boy, Orly on the witness stand under oath! That would be worth the price of admission! And, everything she’s posted on her website and all her legal garbage would be fair game! Pass the popcorn!

  41. avatar
    Bob March 24, 2012 at 11:21 am #

    In depth coverage of the Ayers/mailman non-story by Sadly,No!:

    ☞LINK

  42. avatar
    Northland10 March 24, 2012 at 11:23 am #

    J. Potter: According to Breaking Bad, it’s thermite. Surely not pure thermite … if I recall the episode it required some processing.

    Calling Jamie and Adam. It might be time for the “Etch-A-Sketch of Doom.”

  43. avatar
    Thomas Brown March 24, 2012 at 1:58 pm #

    J. Potter: According to Breaking Bad, it’s thermite. Surely not pure thermite … if I recall the episode it required some processing.

    Thermite is a specific admixture of aluminum powder and iron filings, so it is plausible I suppose. I read an article on making small cast iron parts using thermite, avoiding the need for a kiln capable of melting iron.

  44. avatar
    Thomas Brown March 24, 2012 at 2:00 pm #

    Dr. Conspiracy:
    The issue about Obama is settled, but the issue with the birthers is not. After Obama leaves office, I’ll either pick up whatever new conspiracy theory is in vogue or take off my shoes, climb a tree and learn to play the flute.

    As long as you donate them to a homecoming deceased war veteran.

  45. avatar
    James M March 28, 2012 at 9:24 pm #

    misha:

    The ethics of tying a dog to the roof of a car, for 12 hours.

    It’s actually a crime in AZ. Potential felony charge. It’s perhaps an unintended consequence of a law that was aimed at cock and pitbull fighters, but there it is.
    The risks for prosecution come mostly from the interpretation of “knowing and reckless”, not from the degree of cruel treatment. I’m quite sure I would not want to be in a position of explaining that I did not “knowingly and recklessly” strap a dog crate to the roof of my Volvo. Not to an AZ highway patrol officer, and definitely not to a jury.

  46. avatar
    misha March 28, 2012 at 9:37 pm #

    James M: It’s actually a crime in AZ. Potential felony charge. The risks for prosecution come mostly from the interpretation of “knowing and reckless”, not from the degree of cruel treatment.I’m quite sure I would not want to be in a position of explaining that I did not “knowingly and recklessly” strap a dog crate to the roof of my Volvo.Not to an AZ highway patrol officer, and definitely not to a jury.

    Police Stop Dogs Against Romney Protester for Having Dog Crate on Car Roof:

    A Dogs Against Romney Pack Member was stopped by the Littleton, Colorado police yesterday for having a dog crate on the roof of his car. The Pack Member , identified only as “Oredigger,” was on his way to protest at a Mitt Romney event yesterday with the crate atop his car carrying a stuffed toy dog when the police officer, believing he was actually transporting a live dog on the roof of his car, stopped him. Says Oredigger, “I was pulled over for suspected animal abuse.”

    Read on:
    http://www.dogsagainstromney.com/2012/02/breaking-police-stop-dogs-against.html

  47. avatar
    Scientist March 28, 2012 at 9:41 pm #

    James M: It’s actually a crime in AZ. Potential felony charge

    It’s a crime just about everywhere these days, though it probably wasn’t in 1983 when he did it. Regardless, this one will be an absolute killer for Romney. His unfavorables are >50%, not only because of this, but it sure doesn’t help him to be seen as cruel to dogs. My wife and I do dog rescue and I can tell you this issue means a lot to millions of people. Frankly, orders of magnitude more than a birth certificate or who the President’s daddy was. Dog lover outnumber birthers 20-1 at a minimum.

  48. avatar
    misha March 28, 2012 at 9:55 pm #

    Scientist: Frankly, orders of magnitude more than a birth certificate or who the President’s daddy was. Dog lover outnumber birthers 20-1 at a minimum.

    And here it is – Join Pet Lovers for Obama:
    https://my.barackobama.com/page/s/om-pet-lovers-for-obama

  49. avatar
    misha March 28, 2012 at 10:00 pm #

    Scientist: My wife and I do dog rescue and I can tell you this issue means a lot to millions of people.

    My cat and my dog are from shelters, and I have health insurance on both.

    Scientist: I come from a long line of scholars, especially Talmudic scholars:
    http://www.telegraph.co.uk/technology/3342979/Cyborg-found-in-outer-space.html

  50. avatar
    Keith March 29, 2012 at 1:33 am #

    James M: It’s perhaps an unintended consequence of a law that was aimed at cock and pitbull fighters

    More likely an intended consequence of a law aimed at the morons that lock their dogs in their cars in 100 degree heat then go into the casino or tavern for 12 hours. Or even just the supermarket for 30 minutes.

    And cook their dog.

  51. avatar
    James M March 29, 2012 at 9:30 am #

    misha: And here it is – Join Pet Lovers for Obama:
    https://my.barackobama.com/page/s/om-pet-lovers-for-obama

    I wonder how contributions on Bo’s behalf stack up versus other campaign metrics? It wouldn’t surprise me if Bo gets more cash than, say, Newt minus his one big angel.

  52. avatar
    misha March 29, 2012 at 2:52 pm #

    James M: It wouldn’t surprise me if Bo gets more cash than, say, Newt minus his one big angel.

    I’m surprised Newt is having cash flow problems. After all, he gets residual income as being the model for the Pillsbury Doughboy.

  53. avatar
    G March 29, 2012 at 4:00 pm #

    LOL!

    But on a serious note, Newt’s Presidential Campaign hopes has finally run its course and he’s “done” for real this time. I know he’s unpredictable and has “risen” from a dead campaign twice in the earlier portions of this cycle, but it is extremely improbable at this stage for him to have any chance of coming back from the “dead” again.

    When he failed to win MS & AL – that was the biggest indicator that his window was closing… however, he did get 2nd place in those states, ahead of frontrunner Romney, so he still had slim hopes to use that to attempt to make an appeal to voters to keep him in this race.

    He was unable to pull off turning that argument into votes. His abysmal 4th place (and single digit) results in IL (8%) were the first clear sign that he couldn’t sway support anymore. But the true final test came when he bombed in his “stronghold” of the South – achieving only 16% in LA – and dropping to a distant third, BEHIND Romney.

    As Santorum has won all threee of MS, AL & LA, he’s proven to have now decisively won the “Conservative alternative” choice argument over Newt at this point and therefore, Newt is now completely out of this race….regardless of whether he refuses to bow out or not.

    There are NO more national TV debates for the GOP Primaries, so Newt has lost that public forum. His campaign financing has dried up and he is about out of money and his sugar daddy has cut off the funding. The last campaign coverage press that embedded with him left after LA. So he is now running on an empty tank and even if he refuses to leave and tries to make outrageous statements, there is a good chance that nobody will hear or notice.

    Because he gained delegates, he will likely have some role or speech in the GOP convention, but that will probably be the end of it. His only hope to have any other role or relevance is if Romney fails to clearly cross the 1144 delegate threshold. If that happens, then Newt might pop back in the news and have a role in legal challenges to delegate allocations in places like FL and elsewhere…and also might threaten to wield his delegates to make for a more heated floor fight…but that still is about it. Both Newt & Paul are now reduced to that same level of activity, but are otherwise irrelevant in this race.

    For the moment, it still remains a two man race between Romney and Santorum…with the odds highly in Romney’s favor, but with a slim and narrow window for Santorum to remain as a valid contender. Santorum needs to win WI on April 3rd (or only lose by a very narrow margin) to maintain his chances. Because there are two dynamics at play – the very real delegate “math” accumulation AND the momentum of perception, there are still two avenues towards convincing voters in later races to still support a candidate. WI is Winner Take All, so whoever wins, regardless of margin, gets ALL 42 delegates from that contest.

    If Mitt wins WI and does so with a commanding and decisive margin over Santorum (now that we’re down to a two-man race, I would say that would be a 10% margin), then Rick it will be extremely difficult for Rick to continue to make his argument convincingly and that will most likely cause him to lose all the contests between then and his home state of PA on April 24th…and if that all happens AND Rick loses PA, the race is truly over at that point.

    http://politicalwire.com/archives/2012/03/28/adelson_isnt_writing_more_checks_for_gingrich.html

    http://politicalwire.com/archives/2012/03/27/gingrich_cuts_staff.html

    http://politicalwire.com/archives/2012/03/27/newt_gingrich_as_the_black_knight.html

    misha: I’m surprised Newt is having cash flow problems. After all, he gets residual income as being the model for the Pillsbury Doughboy.

  54. avatar
    JPotter March 29, 2012 at 7:26 pm #

    Keith: And cook their dog.

    Even the Chinese are turning against animal cruelty. Dog meat has been a staple / delicacy there for millenia. NPR just ran a great piece on how activists are using social media to rescue animals from butchers.

    So far as we know, Romney hasn’t eaten any dogs. So far as we know…. ;)

  55. avatar
    aarrgghh March 29, 2012 at 8:26 pm #

    JPotter: So far as we know, Romney hasn’t eaten any dogs. So far as we know….

    but romney MAY have eaten a dog … ergo, romney MUST have eaten a dog.

    </birfer>