A fable

I was over at ORYR this morning, and they had embedded at the head of the article an ad in the Washington Times. This is a excerpt from it:

… in a period of 21 months, using every forensic test known to man, Sheriff Joe Arpaio and his forensic investigators have conclusively proved that what Barack Obama offered to the American people as his "official long form" birth certificate is a composite. Any further rhetoric about "conspiracy" from either the left or a complicit media must fall on deaf ears. This so-called "conspiracy" is over. The "conspiracy claims" by the honest Americans merely seeking to know the whole TRUTH have been legitimized by the evidence.

It reminded me of a fable by the Russian fabulist Ivan Krylov, “The Peasant and the Sheep.”

THE PEASANT AND THE SHEEP

A PEASANT hauled a sheep to court,
And pressed against her there a serious objection.
A fox, as judge, is ready for a fault’s detection.
Hears plaintiff first and, then, defendant in retort;
Taking in turn each point, and cool, though others  stammer.
He seeks the cause of all the clamor.
The peasant says: "My lord ! when visiting my yard,
I found two chickens missing ; ’twas in early morning;
Only their bones and feathers served me as a warning;
This sheep alone was there on guard!"
The sheep replies: "No strange event my slumbers marred;
Prithee, the evidence of neighbors don’t discard;
Against me ne’er was brought a charge of thieving
Or other crime
At any time;
As to my tasting flesh, ’tis notion past conceiving."
Here are the fox’s judgments from their earliest weaving:
“I no way can accept the pleadings of this sheep,
Because all rogues are skilled to keep
Their wicked purposes from others.
‘Tis clear from plaintiff’s words that, on the given night.
Defendant held the fowl-house well in sight;
Now, who can think she smothers
An inborn wish for viands choice?
So I decide, by conscience’ sacred voice,
She cannot have admitted
Hens were for her unfitted!
Her guilt is clear and lets the peasant win;
The carcass comes to me, and he will get the skin."

The Cold Case Posse with Jerome Corsi as a founding member reminds me of the self-serving judgment of the fox in this story of the prosecution of a chicken thief. Indeed Joe Arpaio and the Cold Case Posse investigating Obama is like putting the fox in charge of the hen house.

You can listen to my audiobook of Krylov’s Fables at The Internet Archive.

About Dr. Conspiracy

I'm not a real doctor, but I have a master's degree.
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18 Responses to A fable

  1. Keith says:

    I think this is about the same thing:

    QI: Season 8 episode 10: Health and Safety

    If nothing else, it identifies the origin of the phrase that describes the actions of the CCP when dealing with its ‘constituency’.

  2. JPotter says:

    When nothing else works, declare victory. The rhetoric gets loftier and loftier …. “every forensic test known to man …” Oh, brudder.

    “Any further rhetoric about ‘conspiracy’ from either the left or a complicit media must fall on deaf ears.” Birtherism: Turn on, tune in, drop out!

    Running ads in the Moonie Times, lame attempt to have a trial in the court of public opinion. What a curious way to “run” an “investigation” LOL

  3. Woodrowfan says:

    “The Washington Times”? Really? Were the rates at “The Penny Shopper” too expensive? The Times is a joke even in DC…

  4. Publius says:

    The link provided to the ad didn’t seem to work. I had a bit of difficulty finding the ad referred to, but I believe I found it.

    Hopefully this will work. I think it’s the same ad:

    http://www.scribd.com/fullscreen/158143791?access_key=key-115nh34utw0hig2qcy6l&allow_share=true&show_recommendations=false&view_mode=scroll

    The thing that constantly amazes me is how people will buy into total, absolute BS. When you look at the evidence, this stuff is like people taking out ads claiming that they’ve discovered that the United States was actually set up as a monarchy, and we’ve been lied to all these years, and John Travolta is the rightful heir to the throne.

    So call your Congressman today, and urge him to open an official investigation into the matter, and have John Travolta installed as King of the United States. And anyone who doesn’t, or who opposes the idea, is an oppressive government agent or a traitor.

    The only difference between the two is that the Obama BS is more believable.

  5. The article link works for me. The ad you found looks to be the same one.

    Publius: The link provided to the ad didn’t seem to work. I had a bit of difficulty finding the ad referred to, but I believe I found it.

  6. Publius says:

    Hmm. I tried it from a different browser and got it.

    Kind of strange.

    Wait… I know. The birthers, financed by Bill Gates, have hacked into my computer and are deliberately screwing with me.

    What federal agency can I report them to?

    Gosh. Now I can’t go out of my house. They’re out there, watching me through binoculars.

  7. Publius says:

    The link you provided also gives a link to a previous ad run in the Times:

    http://www.scribd.com/doc/159654735/Washington-Times-Obama-Got-Top-Job-In-World-With-Phony-ID-8-12-2013

    I briefly entertained the idea of becoming a collector of birther agitprop. Print it out in color, and create a little museum of sorts.

    Interesting to note that both ads contain solicitations for donations to the Clown Cars Posse.

  8. Publius says:

    Oh. And check out the weird image of Obama in the second ad.

  9. CarlOrcas says:

    Publius:
    Oh. And check out the weird image of Obama in the second ad.

    That’s the “Scary Black Man” enhancement option provided everyone who makes a donation to the Cold Case Posse.

  10. Woodrowfan: “The Washington Times”? Really? Were the rates at “The Penny Shopper” too expensive?

    “Shopping Center News” would not accept their ad – they’re lucky kitty litter “The Washington Times” did accept.

  11. Curious George says:

    “The “conspiracy claims” by the honest Americans merely seeking to know the whole TRUTH have been legitimized by the evidence.”

    Hogwash. Take your evidence to the local PA and see if he’ll act on it. Didn’t think so. Here’s the TRUTH. Everything on the Obama PDF has been verified by the state of Hawaii. You continue to deny the TRUTH.

  12. So you will have something to show when the kids say, “Daddy, what did you do in the birther wars?”

    Publius: I briefly entertained the idea of becoming a collector of birther agitprop. Print it out in color, and create a little museum of sorts.

  13. G says:

    That was hilarious! Birtherism truly is akin to blowing smoke up the arse… and just as effective.

    Keith:
    I think this is about the same thing:

    QI: Season 8 episode 10: Health and Safety

    If nothing else, it identifies the origin of the phrase that describes the actions of the CCP when dealing with its ‘constituency’.

  14. Rickey says:

    JPotter:
    When nothing else works, declare victory. The rhetoric gets loftier and loftier …. “every forensic test known to man …” Oh, brudder.

    That reminds me of Sam Sewell claiming “victory” even as each birther lawsuit was being dismissed.

  15. Yoda says:

    G:
    That was hilarious!Birtherism truly is akin to blowing smoke up the arse… and just as effective.

    Didn’t Apuzzo do the same thing?

  16. Andrew Vrba, PmG says:

    Honestly, the birthers would just be better off making their own Skyrim mod where player can screech at the NPCs about Obama’s BC and SSN. At least then they could have at least an artificial sense of accomplishment.

  17. G says:

    I would argue just the opposite: The tall tale you just invented about a monarchy leading to John Travolta as the “rightful heir to the throne” is silly nonsense, but at least in a fairly simplistic and straightforward manner. Some creative mind could at least flesh out a linear narrative to fill in the gaps from points A to Z and voila, you get made-for-TV movie story line that is merely “plausible” enough fiction to be follow- able and that some merely ignorant and gullible person might mistake as being a believable narrative.

    The mythology of Birtherism, on the other hand, is so overly bloated with completely contradictory crapola and grandiose irrational improbabilities, combined with meaningless picking at nonsensical nits, that it is beyond stupid on nearly all levels. No rational person can listen to much of it, without grasping how quickly the conflicting and convoluted narratives fall apart.

    Anyone with a functioning brain that can think beyond being stuck in a primitive, emotional derangement-sydrome gut-level response of “Ug. Obama. Bad. Need. Say. And. Hear. Bad. Things. ‘Bout. Him” will soon realize that stories of Elvis partying on the moon are more plausible (and by that I mean not at all) than the nonsense that Birthers try to spew.

    Birtherism is entertaining and fascinating as a phenomenon, in part because it has become one of the most irrational and poorly conceived paranoid conspiracy whoppers to come about and gain notice in quite some time. It is “cr@p-tastic” in all the wrong ways and garnishes attention beyond its small enclave of delusional adherents mainly because it is so mind-boggling to conceive of such a social “car wreck”, in which either con artists or gullible people can string together such asinine insanity with a straight face and then continue the farce for years on end.

    Publius: The thing that constantly amazes me is how people will buy into total, absolute BS. When you look at the evidence, this stuff is like people taking out ads claiming that they’ve discovered that the United States was actually set up as a monarchy, and we’ve been lied to all these years, and John Travolta is the rightful heir to the throne.

    So call your Congressman today, and urge him to open an official investigation into the matter, and have John Travolta installed as King of the United States. And anyone who doesn’t, or who opposes the idea, is an oppressive government agent or a traitor.

    The only difference between the two is that the Obama BS is more believable.

  18. G says:

    He should become a salesman and spokesperson for those devices. Heck, he’s always drowning and in “over his head” when he tries to take his scam beyond the confines of his little blog site, so yeah, that device was made for people like him and his flock…

    Yoda: Didn’t Apuzzo do the same thing?

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