Obama Conspiracy Limerick Contest Winner Epectitus!

The Obama Conspiracy Limerick contest is over, and we have a winner. I was very impressed by the number and quality of the entries. I hope you had as much fun as I did.

If it pans out, I will be on Reality Check Radio this Tuesday night (9 PM EST) and will be reading some of the entries.

And the winner is Epectitus with this entry:

Conspiracy theories generic
Require ideas esoteric
And massive infusions
Of wacky delusions
From crackpots like “Dr. Polarik.”


One of mine garnered quite a few votes:

There once was a student from Taft
Whose suits were dismissed 'cause t'were daft;
And then without reason
Accused them of treason
While judges in chambers just laughed.

Here are other popular entries, and favorites of mine.

Let us pray that this fringe gets no bigger
And none set their hands to the trigger
So full of hate
They cannot tolerate
That the voters elected a …


A Philadelphia lawyer named Phil,
an attorney of dubious skill,
Tried to stop one Barack,
with a suit based on crock,
and from there his career went downhill.


A lawyer with an axe to grind,
raved loudly and ranted and whined,
she called the Judge a traitor,
and the tool of a dictator,
and of course in the end she was fined.


She’s frustrated when she debates,
the law she often misstates,
procedure eludes her,
and Charles denudes her,
She’s the birther queen named Orly Taitz.


Though Obama has proved, with finality,
He’s legal and fit in totality,
These Birthers believe
There’s a plot to deceive
(Thus belying their lower mentality).

–Jim Pettit

The Birthers are still filled with hate.
Our First Family just makes them irate.
“But, he has Kenyan kin!”
Crazy theories they spin.
He was born in the 50th state.


Next month, I’m thinking about another poetry contest, but this time using the Double Dactyl form.

About Dr. Conspiracy

I'm not a real doctor, but I have a master's degree.
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10 Responses to Obama Conspiracy Limerick Contest Winner Epectitus!

  1. Limerick fans will recognize this one:

    An epicure dining at Crewe
    Found Orly Taitz in his stew.
    Said the waiter, don't shout
    Or wave it about
    Or the rest will be wanting to sue.

  2. Epectitus says:

    I am humbled and thrilled by this honor. I should not point out that, since it was one of the earliest entries, it also had the most time for garnering votes and thus probably won more for its age than its excellence.

    But I’ll take what I can get.


  3. Scientist says:

    Doc- Before Epectitus is awarded his prie, I demand to see his certification of limerick writing eligibility. And I’m talking about the long form with the seal and the name of his 3rd grade teacher.

  4. Sorry, you lack standing.

  5. On this blog, the rule of law prevails. Congrats.

  6. I think brygenon’s entry is truer than many of us “forgers” would like to admit.

    Truth in jest?

  7. liz sohn says:

    if obama actually deserves the noble prize, then my skin is going to turn orange

  8. Greg says:

    Too much fake tanner?

  9. G says:

    John Boehner, is that you? 😉

  10. I hope you are documenting the change in your skin color with photos.

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